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Lull After the Storm

The weekend euphoria must have well and truly subsided to some extent. Mondays can do that even to the merriest of the lot. We also discussed pretty much everything that needed to be discussed. Some people decided to murder Rooney for his poor goal returns, others decided to murder those who decided to murder Rooney. Some were worried that Ronaldo was scoring more goals than providing assists, others dismissed that as mere selfishness. Some discussed about Ben Foster, others were preoccupied with solving the conundrum of how best to fill the two holes in central midfield that could pulverize one and all. Some wanted the team to demolish all opposition, others were happy just winning.

A casual observer was meanwhile found scratching his head — a glance at the league table showed him that Manchester United were on top and five points ahead. Little did he understand the true nature of fandom. There can be no end to bitching, regardless of your team’s position — and Red Rants certainly does have a nice place to do said bitching. Enough of the self-aggrandizement, though, on to some news of note.

United’s media manager, cum spokesperson, cum central midfielder, made a remark yesterday, or was it the day before — I can’t really tell. Here it is:

We’re well aware that when we play our best, we will beat anyone. But we’ve got a tough run-in, so we’re not going to get carried away. Having said that, we’re happy with the position we’re in, that’s for sure.

Postman Left back Pat, went further with this:

We know we are in a great position now but we know we have seven games which will be like seven finals. We have to win those seven finals. We have our destiny in our hands.

I preferred what Sir Alex used to say: “It’s squeaky bum time.” Saves everyone energy, doesn’t it?

Speaking of Sir Alex, he’s cautioned his players that the title is not sealed yet. We have Chelsea and Arsenal left to contend with, and with the results from Sunday, a good run from Chelsea and a couple of slip ups from us could really turn things around. So, like always, no one can really afford to get cocky anymore.

Meanwhile, we have a boring round of internationals coming up on Wednesday. Now, isn’t that wonderful? For fuck’s sake! Thankfully, Capello thought Carrick was shit. More importantly though, Ronaldo and Nani were withdrawn from Portugal’s games as a precautionary measure — hopefully they are fit for the weekend. Unfortunately, Rio, Rooney, Anderson, Vidic, Hargreaves and the rest would have to go. We wish them all the luck in the world and also tell them to watch their step as they walk out of the comfort zone of Old Trafford.

Meanwhile Mascherano is still surprised why he was sent off. Someone sit him down, explain him in English, then in Spanish, then in Portuguese and then in sign language, that he was as high as Courtney Love and had an IQ of a lamp post. Of course, he may not understand this article in the Telegraph on Bennet’s bold decision.

And that’s all there is to it, at the time of writing. You could, of course, continue to discuss anything that was seemingly left out over the past week. Anything from efficient lawn mowing to the inside scoop on how Fergie likes to down his wine. Or we could just talk about football — now who wants to talk about something as bland as that, eh?